As far as bullshit titles go, OpenReach’s Uber Complex Chief Engineer has to be right up there with the best of them. Not making this up, this from my most excellent ISP, A&A:

Apologies for the delay in provision of your FTTP service. We have escalated this with Openreach and have today received the following update:

“This order has been escalated to the Chief Engineer teams, are scheduled to attend within the next 5 working days to assist in resolving the issue. The order has been referred to this team as part of the Uber Complex Chief Engineer trial. Chief Engineers will manage the orders until the customer is in service.”

I must admit, this has raised a whole lot of (complex) questions in my mind. (Like, what colour is the cape, and how do these guys travel, Jet Pack, or Uber?)

Goes without saying, I am awaiting this person with a great anticipation, for someone was supposed to show up in ‘a few days’ five weeks ago.

Mind you, we were promised fiber (as in FTTC) in this area more than a decade ago, but then BT realized they would have had to upgrade the existing exchange, so they quietly dropped the plans, and we have been relegated to some of the worst internet connection in the country (for our area is neither sufficiently posh to make it worth the commercial effort, nor sufficiently rural for Scottish Goverment to care).

So you can imagine my excitement when a decade later OpenReach have started digging up the pavements to lay down the fiber for FTTP! We might soon have Internet speeds matching those of the good folk in the Outer Hebrides. 🙂